Review: Jolly Roger: Massacre at Cutter's Cove (2005)

Done as Dr. Gore would do when confronted with a bad movie that really tried hard to be a good movie:

There's a pirate come back from the dead. His name is Jolly Roger and he causes a massacre at Cutter's Cove. He kills people and collects their heads. He puts the heads in his treasure chest in the hopes that his treasure chest will turn into a chest full of treasure. He kills some teens that are partying at the beach. He kills some strippers. He kills some office workers. It's a bona fide massacre.

The killings are gruesome, but in true ancient pirate killing people fashion, they are hokey enough that someone should get hold of this film's editor and put HIS head in a treasure chest. Example: the first kill is the teens having sex kill. The girl's on top and she's topless. Jolly Roger comes up behind and splits her in two. The camera cuts to the guy on bottom. There's a two-second pause and then blood is squirted on his face from off-camera. Bad editing.

If you're in the mood for a pirate putting heads in a treasure chest this movie is for you! Don't pay attention too hard and you might enjoy it.